The former Document-Forger-In-Chief, who is supposed to be cooling off in one of the congested prisons in the country for that offence alone, but who still has the temerity to walk tall on our street, was forced to confess today that he actually received the N840 Million which he was ‘alleged’ to have benefited from the total of N3.145 Billion that was shared amongst those that were close to the former President, Dr. Goodluck Jonathan, in his infamous campaign to retain the sweet power.
As a matter of fact and the way things went, there was no way this leaking-mouthed, Northern-hater would have denied receiving the money after the operatives of the dutiful Economic and Financial Crime Commission (EFCC) had done a clean job of their investigations, by quoting the bank into which the money was paid, the account number, the exact amount paid at different dates until the whole money was completed.
It was like a pastor who was caught the other day, pumping away atop the beautiful wife of one of the members of his Church. When he was caught red-handed, he had nothing to say other than that it was the work of the devil; that was when even the man-of-God would himself become the devil.
In the case of Fani Kayode, I imagined what he would have said and or done if the EFCC had just mentioned his name as one of the beneficiaries of the great loot without the details provided. He would have gone to the press, wrote 20-page press statement, addressed gullible newsmen and women and blew all the grammar he could muster, including some jargons from Yoruba accent that cannot be found in the modern dictionary.
Fani Kayode would have tagged President Muhammadu Buhari as a dictator who had come after him simply because he waged disastrous campaign of calumny, personal destruction and shameless vendetta against him during the last campaigns. He would have gathered some hungry youths, made hungry by his own part of looting that deprived the same youths access to employments and good living, to protest that the Northern leaders have come on him simply because he is a Yoruba man from the South West, and or because he is outspoken against the Northerners and Muslims. He would have cursed all the Northerners and Muslims for framing him up.
Fani Kayode, indeed, would have attempted to curry support from ignorant international community, and he would have even aligned with the agitators for the actualization of the Republic of Biafra just so that he would have enough followers and clouts to fight off the government he sees as disturbing the sick status-quo, to which he is a chief beneficiary: the government of Buhari that, in reality, is systematically restoring Nigeria to some kind of sanity, from the insanity to which the immediate past leadership, with person like Fani Kayode as the chief architect, led it to.
Caught red-handed or pant-down or both, Fani Kayode admitted, surprisingly without a cent of resistance, that he actually received the N840 Million, but said, as an after-though, that he used the money for the assignment he was given to execute by former President Jonathan.
He said: “they then paid the money in for the assignment I was given. I asked them where the money came from. They said it was from private contribution for the Jonathan campaign. I believed them, and I had no way of knowing exactly where the money came from.
“As far as I’m concerned, it was campaign funds, and the money was used for the purpose for which it was meant. And we accounted for it to the man who gave us a job to do, President Jonathan.”
That is Fani Kayode speaking matter-of-factly!
And the question that follows immediately is: what was the purpose for which a whooping N840 Million was released to the loud-mouthed Fani Kayode? Was the forging of medical certificate of Ahmadu Bello University Teaching Hospital, Zaria, indicating that Buhari had a terminal illness that rendered him incapable of leading Nigeria part of what he used N840 Million to do?
Was the conspiracy with some renegade military men or women, still in service to hide Buhari’s secondary school certificate from his file at the time he (Fani Kayode) was making the certificate a big campaign issue part of the assignment he used N840 Million to execute? Eehem, Fani Kayode eehem???
Fani Kayode has been kind enough to say that he had already accounted for the N840 Million given to him and his team to the man who gave them the ‘job’ to do, which of course, is the former President, Dr. Jonathan, but he truly owe Nigerians another form of explanations as to how much of the huge sum he received was devoted to try to deconstruct the personality of Buhari.
He needs to tell Nigerians where he hide the huge sum of money to the extent that what is remaining in his bank account now is below N200,000. I advise EFCC to go searching his suckaway or a grave in the back yard of his house or houses or even the grave side of his father!
In any case, would one be correct to say that Fani Kayode came on board of Jonathan campaign organization with strict instruction to demystify Buhari, a man who is old enough to be his grandfather, all in the name of worldly thing?
Ha, what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his soul? As in the sad case of Femi Fani Kayode?
It is important, necessary and appropriate for the Fani Kayode of this miserable world to know, if he had not already known it, that there is time for everything: a time to be born, a time to sleep, a time to dream, a time to eat until you suffer from self-inflicted stomach-ache, a time to confess, a time to go to prison, a time to be disgraced and a time to finally, finally die! Such days are numbered; and they are coming. [myad]
