Suspended senator representing Kogi Central , Natasha Akpoti -Uduaghan decided to bring herself to sordid spotlight again by hurling into public space an asinine piece entitled “Satirical Apology Letter” and addressed to Distinguished Senator Godswill Akpabio, President of the Nigerian Senate.
In the ill-advised and inelegant piece of insolence against the Nation and its institution, Natasha attempts to wax intellectual by introducing the concept of satire into the uncouth letter . It is obvious that she has almost no knowledge of the concept and its import. Satire implies criticizing people or ideas in a humorous way in order to make a political point. And so in this piece of absurdity , who is she criticizing or which idea is her target of intention. The vile piece is nothing more than serialized lies and calculated deception.
The so-called apology letter is a burlesque, a parody and not a satire as she ignorantly claims. Burlesque is an absurd or comically exaggerated imitation of something especially in a literary or dramatic work. It is a device in communication which fits her skewed thinking in this circumstance. Unfortunately in her hysteria and swashbuckling, she does not pay attention to learning.
The above framework fits what Natasha has been doing these past few months. She has proven herself a poor drama queen who is very poor at interpreting scripts yet presents the public with absurd dramatic optics with the intent to manipulate them. Her works so far have remained bland and unconvincing despite her concerted efforts. Her theatrical outputs are tasteless, insipid and vacuous of any mental deposit.
It is sad that even though they credit her as being a lawyer, no action of hers reflects that any learning from that noble discipline was acquired by her even inadvertently. She is lawless, undisciplined, unbridled in her tongue and bereft of logical reasoning. Her public conduct flies ethics and moral values in the face. So what type of lawyer is she ? Pity!
If she were a lawyer, she would have been familiar with the law of evidence. She would also have known that he who alleges must prove . But Natasha has continued to dish out random narratives that are far-fetched in evidence and even logic. Sometimes the storylines are so childish that people are forced to see her actions as that of an “agbaya”; a Yoruba usage loosely referred to an old person who acts childishly with not much sense. And to know that this person was a member of the highest legislative body in the land until her suspension puts this nation on a questionable threshold in the leadership recruitment process.
In her malevolent, malicious and deceptive letter which is replete with pun, Natasha proves that she had a chequered upbringing that was far from decent and the manifestations are what she is grappling with. Her petulant nature , her ease with fabrication of lies, the consistent introduction of new allegations like “private dinner behind closed doors” and her use of lewd puns like “erection” for “election” summarize her as debased and lacking in moral values.
In her over- bloated, ego she calls herself a stubborn woman. Is it a virtue? Even though she is likely to claim that, the stubbornness is about her strength of character, she knows that she is economical with the truth if she nurses such an assumption. Her past records are in clear dissonance with such assumptions and so would not support such claims. And let no one talk about change or repentance. It is easy to spot those cut for repentance when one sees them. She does not bear any such value.
She signs off her inane letter with “Yours in eternal resistance”. Interesting. It is obvious that she is yielding to populism rather than sense and playing to the gallery. May I kindly remind her of an adage which submits that “a dog that is destined to get missing will never hear the hunter’s whistle”. Before she construes this as a threat to abduct her, this adage refers solely to her political career which she is railroading to destruction because of untamed conduct and bloated ego.
The last lines, “Unafraid, Unbought, and Unbroken tell the story of a young woman who lives in delusional cravings and fabricates false narratives as a habit to satiate whatever is hounding or haunting her.
Gbenga Oshinowo wrote in from Abuja.
