The Ahmadiyya Muslim Jama’at has cursed treasury looters and warned that if they do not return the money they stole from the nation’s treasury, God will punish them.
The group whose members commenced activities to mark its 100 years of existence in Nigeria and 127 years of the group’s establishment in the world, spoke against the background of the ongoing trial of many Nigerians over the $2.1 Billion meant to procure arms for the nation’s soldiers fighting Boko Haram in the North East.
The Head of the group in Nigeria, Mashuud Fashola, who addressed news men in Lagos further warned those he called “self centered Nigerians” who plundered the nation’s resources of the wrath of God, if they did not return the stolen commonwealth.
“When the United States said Nigeria government was not sincere in fighting insurgents then, we thought they didn’t want to help but with the Dasuki arms-gate saga, it shows they know what they were talking about.”
Fashola expressed appreciation to God for the growth of the Islamic organization in Nigeria since 1916 when it was introduced in the country.
The Missionary in Charge, Ahmadiyyah Muslim, Abdul-Khalique Sahib, prayed for peaceful coexistence in Nigeria and the current efforts to combat the Lassa fever epidemic. [myad]
With the demise on Tuesday, of the 101 year old Oba Samuel Odugade, the Olubadan of Ibadan for 80 years, a stage is set for a fight between two royal Houses over who ascend the throne.
While the head of Seriki family has asked the Olubadan-in-Council to install Chief Adebayo Oyediji as the new Olubadan, the Balogun Olubadan House is insisting that it is its turn to present High Chief Saliu Adetunji for the throne, arguing that it is kin consonance with Ibadan succession system.
Oyediji, 89, had argued that the Olubadan-in-Council would be flouting a 1989 ruling of the Supreme Court, which granted him the right to become the next king of Ibadan after Oba Odugade’s reign if it crowned 87-year-old Adetunji as the new Ibadan king. He had said: “I am the next to be installed (the) Olubadan and not Adetunji.” According to him the last Otun Seriki, Chief Adisa Akinloye, was denied the opportunity to become the Olubadan before he died in 2007 and that the Seriki family was the third line in the Olubadan succession system. Oyediji said he was already in court to ensure that the Supreme Court judgment, which was in his family’s favour, is obeyed. Speaking on behalf of the Olubadan-in-Council, however, the Ashipa Balogun Olubadan of Ibadanland, High Chief Abimbola Ajibola, said the Seriki line was not recognized in the city’s succession plan to the kingship and therefore had no right to become the Olubadan. Ajibola, who spoke after a meeting of the high chiefs at the Monatan home of the late Olubadan, debunked Oyediji’s claim that there was a Supreme Court ruling that qualified him as the next king of the ancient city. “It is undisputed that the next Olubadan is High Chief Saliu Adetunji; that is the only authentic Olubadan-in-waiting, any other one is a counterfeit.” Ajibola pointed out that no court ruling would set aside or supersede the Olubadan succession system and that the law, as spelt out, must always be respected. He added that apart from the Olubadan-in-Council, no one could declare himself as the Olubadan. “In this (our) institution, we have two lines that are recognized by law (to occupy the throne of the Olubadan). We have the Otun Olubadan line and the Balogun line; that is all. There is no third line. “Nobody is competent to say that he wants to be the Olubadan. No one can appoint himself; so, the man (Oyediji) cannot put himself there. We are not aware of any judgment that he is claiming because at the moment, there is nothing like a Seriki line.” Ajibola explained that the situation outlined in the 1959 Ekerin Balogun of Ibadan Chieftaincy Declaration and the vacancies created by the death of the Balogun Olubadan, High Chief Sulaimon Omiyale, and the Otun Olubadan, High Chief Omowale Kuye, last year, was not the same. “Even the 1959 Declaration law says that if there are two vacant positions in one line (not two lines as it happened in the case of Omiyale, who was from the Balogun line, and Kuye, who was from the Otun Olubadan line), the Seriki will produce someone to come in. “No other judgment can overrule that law. Even though two deaths occurred in succession last year in the two lines, the vacancies were filled by the Olubadan before his death. There is no more vacancy. So, where will the Seriki line come in? “There is no Seriki now because the only Seriki we knew was Adisa Akinloye and he is dead. How can someone now say that he is the head of Seriki line and entitled to become the Olubadan? Who will sign his declaration?” Ajibola said that Governor Abiola Ajimobi is aware of the existing law, which favours Adetunji as the next Olubadan and that only the kingmakers (Olubadan-in-Council) had the right to recommend a candidate to the governor. “All the Olubadan-in-Council members will sign a document for anyone who is picked to become the Olubadan. The governor will not listen to the Seriki’s claim because as the kingmakers in Ibadan, anyone that the Olubadan-in-Council presents will be accepted. “Those who claim to be in Seriki line have never had any meeting with us and they have never been promoted by the Olubadan. They should have asked the late Olubadan to promote them before he died. They did not do what is right at the appropriate time. “The news about someone else saying he is entitled to the throne is fake, it is not true. The only competent person from that line (Seriki) is dead. “The man called Adebayo Oyediji, who wants to be the Olubadan now, is only the Osi Seriki in that line. He should have applied to the late Olubadan to be promoted before he began arguing. “He is not competent and nobody will present him to the governor because he will not listen. He (governor) knows the right thing because he is aware of the existing structure and chieftaincy system. We (Olubadan-in-Council) do not recognize him (Oyediji).” The President-General of the Central Council of Ibadan Indigenes, Chief Wole Akinwande, said the history of succession in the city should be respected. “In the history of Ibadanland, no Seriki has ever become Olubadan and if you go by the history, there is nothing to fight about. The law court is there and Seriki has gone to court. As far as the history goes, which is my own personal opinion, Seriki is not in line to become the Olubadan.” Oyediji was, however, unfazed by the position of the kingmakers, as he insisted that he would pursue his case in the court, saying that he would not join the council in an argument over who would become the next Olubadan, even as he sadi that he preferred to wait for the court to decide the matter. “I invite them to join me in court when judgment will be delivered over the matter. I don’t want to talk about their decision.” [myad]
Former secretary to the Federal government, Olu Falae has said that he is ashamed to e linked to the alleged $2.1 billion meant for the procurement of arms for the nation’s soldiers that are fighting Boko Haram insurgents in the North East but allegedly diverted by the former National Security Adviser (NSA), Sambo Dasuki for different purposes.
Falae, who is the national leader of the Social Democratic Party (SDP), speaking at a meeting of his party in Abuja, said that judging from his pedigree and stand against corruption in the past, it was really unfair to assume that he collected the said N100 million from the former NSA.
He however, explained that the N100 million was the money given to the SDP by the then ruling party, the People’s Democratic Party (PDP) which he insisted was meant to assist the party (PDP) in campaigning.
He said that the fact that he was the national leader of the party does not mean that he was given the money for his personal use but that the PDP and the SDP agreed to work together.
Since the PDP had money, he argued, it made donations to smaller party to assist in campaigning for its candidates.
Meanwhile, members of the SDP has passed a vote of confidence on Falae and urged him to continue with his leadership of the party as they were solidly behind him. [myad]
The Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN), has exempted salary earners and individual depositor from the N50 Stamp Duty policy which it has just introduced.
The CBN Director, Corporate Communications, Malam Ibrahim Mu’azu, in a statements said that payments of salaries and wages as well as payments and deposits for self-to-self transactions whether inter or intra bank are exempted.
Mu’azu said that charge was on all receipts issued by banks or financial institutions in acknowledgment of services rendered in respect of teller deposits and electronic transfers for a value of N1,000 and above.
“The implementation of the Stamp Duty at this point in time emanated from a Federal High Court order that the CBN should direct deposit money banks under its supervision to commence the collection of the duty on behalf of the federal government.
“Consequently, the money deposit banks have been directed to commence the collection of the duty.
“Banks are to collect the N50 stamp duty and remit same to the Nigerian Postal Services (NIPOST) on behalf of the customer.
“There are however some exemptions and these include payments of salaries and wages, payments and deposits for self-to-self transactions whether inter or intra bank among others.
“The N50 stamp duty is charged per transaction and NOT per volume. Hence, irrespective of the amount, the sum of N50 is to be charged provided such a transaction is N1,000 and above.” [myad]
42-year-old pastor, Chidiebere Ikpa, has been arrested by the Lagos State Police Command for allegedly raping his 14-year-old stepdaughter in the Surulere area of the state.
The unidentified victim, a Senior Secondary 2 student who reported the incident to the police, insisted she was raped by the pastor on several occasions.
However, on his part, Ikpa denied the allegation, saying that it was a neighbour, whom he identified only as Richard, that defiled the 14-year-old girl, and that he decided not to report the matter to the police because he (Ikpa) had a forgiving character.
The victim (name withheld) said she told her mother about it every time the pastor had canal knowledge of her. She added that whenever she told her mother about it, she usually shouted her down, and refused to take any action on the matter.
The accused, who hails from the Bende Local Government Area of Abia State, was arrested by policemen from the Isokoko division, while the victim was taken for medical examination at the Mirabel Centre, Ikeja.
A police source disclosed that the victim reported that Ikpa had allegedly been sleeping with her since she was ten years old and was the one who ‘deflowered’ her.
According to the source, the victim claimed that the suspect deflowered her when she was 10 years. He had allegedly been sexually molesting the girl since that time.
“The victim’s mother is culpable because she knew about the abuses. The girl said it was when her mother failed to take concrete steps that she came to the police.”
Meanwhile, the pastor, on denying the allegation, said he flogged the girl last Thursday and she disappeared from the house, not knowing she came to the police to lie against him.
“The girl started living with me when she was 12 or thereabout. That was around 2012. It is not true that I raped her. I flogged her on Thursday for being rude and she did not return home after school. We did not see her until Friday. She had been with the police.
“The girl has a boyfriend; his name is Richard. He is the manager of a hotel on Rasak Balogun Street. If the medical result shows someone has been sleeping with her, then it is Richard, not me.
“It is a mystery to me that the girl is claiming that I slept with her. When we caught Richard and confronted him sometime last year, he started begging. The mistake I made was that I did not report to the police.
“My wife got furious and said we must report the matter to the police, but the man started begging, sending text messages to me. I forgave him. I am a pastor,” Ikpa added.
“I was working under a church, but since I moved to this area, I have not pastored any church.”
The victim said Ikpa was lying and he had slept with her on several occasions.
She said: “The first time that he would rape me was about five years ago. My mother sent me to give food to him in his own house. I was then staying in my father’s house. That was when he took advantage of me and raped me.
“The man he mentioned is not my boyfriend. Richard was the man I reported to when I told my mother about the rape and she did not believe me. Richard advised me to leave everything to God.
“Sometimes, when everyone was sleeping, he would come to the room where I was with my other sisters and he would rape me. I would be hitting my sisters trying to wake them, but they did not wake at such times.”
The Lagos State Police Public Relations Officer, SP Dolapo Badmos, confirmed the pastor’s arrest.
“The pastor’s arrest is confirmed. He was transferred from FESTAC to the Isokoko division for further action,” the PPRO confirmed. [myad]
“Your fellow columnists. See how they are attacking the Minister of Interior, General Abdulrahman Dambazau, just because an orderly helped to shine his shoes in public.”
“I really don’t see what the hoopla is all about”
“Me too”
“I think many of our people just like to talk about shoes. For five years, Nigerians kept talking about how former President Goodluck Jonathan had no shoes as a child.”
“But he was the one that started it. Last week or so, the former President was again talking about shoes. In America.”
“I think people love shoes. That is why they won’t also allow Dambazau to rest over his shoes.”
“Read what your friend has written here. He says the orderly was subjecting himself to indignity by bending down to shine his oga’s shoes at a public ceremony.”
“He doesn’t understand. Many of the commentators are probably thinking of their own type of shoes. When you see some shoes, you’d certainly not want a speck of dust anywhere close by. There are shoes and there are shoes. All these people making noise, have they seen some shoes?”
“Someone once showed me his pair of shoes which he said he bought for 2, 000 pounds. I swear I’d gladly clean such shoes even if it is at a solemn funeral.”
“Do you have any idea the type of shoes the Minister was wearing?”
“No. But what does it matter? My point really is that people should stop blaming the Minister. Look when you are in public office, things like that happen. It is the duty of your aides to make sure you look good all the time. “
“I agree. A Minister of the Federal Republic must always be impeccably dressed. If you ask me to choose between Minister Dambazau and that one that wears beret and dresses as if he is going for a Man O’ War session, I’ll choose Dambazau any day.”
“My own point is that nobody should blame the Interior Minister. It is not as if he summoned the orderly and asked him to start shining his shoes in public. These things happen. We should blame the aide. Aides in government corridors are too sycophantic, sometimes, they don’t fit the occasion to the act.”
“I have seen quite a few of such aides. I once went with someone to visit a state Governor. The Governor was the only one sitting on a sofa. All his aides including commissioners sat on the floor. I didn’t know what to do, whether to stand or join the aides on the floor. “
“Those aides often respond to their oga’s body language though. And what did you do?”
“Me? I sat down on the sofa oh. I think it is the aides who are guilty. It is a peculiar kind of ailment: it is called eye service.”
“I know. We don’t really have a civil service.”
“We have an eye service. Anything that will make the boss happy, even if the same aides will later turn around and bad mouth the same boss.”
“You know in some government houses, aides behave like robots. When their boss stands up, they also stand. When the boss sits down, they too sit down. They eat what eats, and when they see the big man’s wife, they start grinning from ear to ear.”
“I have seen otherwise educated aides carrying bags for their Oga’s wife.”
“And you know they don’t need to be forced to do all that. People just do it. It is a way of showing loyalty”
“But I think your friend’s point in this article is that the big men should discourage such behaviour.”
“Have you not seen where people kneel down to talk to their boss? Even when they are asked to stand up or sit down, you’d see adults saying, let me remain on the ground sir. I am fine sir, Your Excellency. I am afraid one of these days, you’d see an aide prostrating publicly to make their boss feel good. Don’t blame the boss, blame the aide.”
“I still believe that some big men actually enjoy it. An old friend lost his job as a commissioner because he had developed the habit of arguing with the Governor at Council meetings. He refused to behave like other commissioners, the oga-is-always-right crowd.”
“Any boss that is always right cannot get it right.”
“You know, the guy told me that at a particular Council meeting, one of his colleagues stood up and told the Governor, sir in fact, I have been meaning to tell you, I don’t know how you do it, you are the wisest man I have ever seen, the best strategist in the world, the best thing to have ever happened to our state. Then, he asked other council members to give the Governor three gbosas. Our friend said he was shocked.”
“So, did he expect the Governor to sack the praise-singer?”
“That particular commissioner always got anything he wanted. Someone like that would willingly clean the Governor’s shoes, he’d in fact gladly do it. ”
“I imagine that it is the same in the corporate world. Some company executives behave like houseboys.”
“It is a Nigerian thing, then. I am sure if General Dambazau had asked that guy not to shine his shoes in public, he would have been very upset. He would think he has fallen out of favour. He was happy serving the boss, the same way policemen are happy to carry bags for other people’s wives.’
“It’s human nature. It’s this whole thing about the survival of the fittest.”
“Like surviving Lassa fever?”
“My brother! That’s frightening. I understand up to about 63 people have died already in 17 states, and that more may die.”
“The Minister of Health, Professor Isaac Adewole says the Nigerian Government will write the obituary of Lassa fever by April.”
“I hope so. If it is possible to do it before April, that will help, because the way Lassa fever is writing the obituary of so many people, it may turn out to be worse than Ebola virus.”
“I think the Minister and his team, and the various state governments are doing a good job of alerting the public to the dangers of Lassa fever. Even government agencies like the NYSC have deployed public enlightenment teams to market places.”
“One man ran away from a hospital while being treated for Lassa fever. May be government should begin to quarantine people. These days, when I see anybody looking sick, even if it is ordinary fever, I start by imagining the worst and I keep my distance.”
“I hear some people eat house rats.”
“What?”
“Then, public enlightenment should become even more vigorous. Eat rat? How can anybody eat Okon Calabar?”
“Who is that?”
“Okon Calabar. That’s what we called rats when I was in school. You know some of these big rats that don’t run away from human beings. When they see you, they actually act like they want to jump on you. I believe those are the real multi mammate rats.”
“I have asked somebody to help me buy two cats.”
“You have rats in your house? What kind of house is that? Where do you live?”
“I live in Babana Island.”
“Babana Island. Not Banana Island? Oh, Babana. That island that is around Abule Egba, close to one refuse dump”
“You no well.”
“When your house is dirty, and nothing is well kept, you’d breed rats, of course.”
“I don’t live in dirty surroundings. I am just taking precautions. And take my advice, also try and buy cats. Let’s kill all the rats in Nigeria.”
“I like that. Let’s kill the rats and save lives. But you don’t need cats, get a fumigator to drive all dangerous things away from your house: rats, cockroaches, mosquitoes.”
“The cost of fumigation has gone up. I hear fumigators are making serious gains now.”
“Very soon, the cost of cats will also rise. “
“Cats?”
“Yes. Don’t you know that everything is business in this country?”
“There are too many human rats out there ready to take advantage.”
“What do you mean human rats?”
“You don’t know some human beings are like rats, causing fever?
“You are speaking in tongues. Okay, name one human rat that you know.”
“I am looking at one right now.”
“Me?”
“Yes”
“No. I am not. You should be talking to those militants in the Niger Delta who are again sabotaging the country by blowing up oil installations, and giving the Federal Government conditions.”
“The Port Harcourt, Warri, and Kaduna refineries have been shut down due to pipeline vandalism. At this rate, we ‘d soon buy fuel at N200 per litre.”
“God knows we can’t afford another round of Niger Delta militancy. We have Boko Haram. We have the Biafra “secessionists.” And now Niger Delta militants are back to the creeks and trying to reverse the gains of the amnesty programme. In the end, we will all suffer for it.”
“Don’ t worry, those boys will be dealt with.”
“At what cost? It is better to nip the crisis in the bud.”
“How? By begging the militants? The Federal Government has made it clear that it will not succumb to blackmail.”
“Who is talking about blackmail?”
“Wahala today. Wahala tomorrow. This Nigeria sef.”
“Yes oh. They are even saying we will now pay stamp duty on all monies paid into our bank accounts once the amount is over N1, 000. When you add that to other bank charges, how much is left?”
“My friend, it is just N50.”
“It is not just N50. Why must I dash government money? Is government now begging for alms? Is it that bad? If I want to give anybody alms, it should be my decision.”
“There is a law called Stamp Duties Act. They want to enforce the law.”
“So, a bank is now a branch of the Post Office? If anybody posts money into my account, government will force me to buy stamp? And yet we want a cashless society? Very soon, people will stop doing electronic transfers.”
“Don’t be stingy. Be a good citizen.”
“N50 on every transaction. For people who run active accounts, that could amount to very heavy tax by the end of a month. You know what? I think they should just re-name the banks and call them post offices, since they are now selling stamps.”
A new study conducted by the World Wide Interweb has revealed some more shocking information about how the male anatomy works and the results.
The first study investigated whether men’s access to resources, or, more technically, their “resource security,” would influence their preferences for chest size in women. One view on human female chest size is that it may act as a signal of fat reserves, which in turn advertises access to resources.
Anchored in this understanding, psychologists Viren Swami and Martin Tovée carried out two experiments to test whether men experiencing relative resource insecurity (that is, those who lack material goods) would find larger breasts more desirable than men experiencing resource security (those who have material goods).
The first experiment explored the relationship between financial security and men’s preferences in chest size. The authors recruited 266 men from three sites in Malaysia that varied in socioeconomic status (low, medium, and high). These participants were shown a series of five animated female figures that varied only in terms of chest size, and then rated them for physical attractiveness on a five-point scale. What did the researchers find? The men from the low socioeconomic background rated bigger breasts as more attractive than did men from the medium socioeconomic background, who in turn endorsed larger breasts as more appealing than men from the high socioeconomic background. In other words, poorer men liked larger breasts.
In the second experiment, the researchers compared the chest size ratings of 66 hungry versus 58 satiated male university students to test whether food security impacted their preferences. These men were asked to participate in the study as they entered or exited campus dining halls during dinner, from approximately 6:00 to 7:00 pm. (Because ethnicity is known to influence chest size preferences, the investigators invited only white British men to participate in this study). They were subsequently presented with the same animated series of female figures that was used in the previous experiment. The researchers then crunched the numbers. What did the results reveal? The hungry men preferred bigger breasts substantially more than the satiated group.
The second study was based on alternate evolutionary perspective on chest size, which maintains that it is a signal of a woman’s capacity to bear and nurture children. Indeed, there is a positive association between levels of estradiol, a fertility-related hormone, and larger chest size; in turn, the combination of larger breasts and a smaller waist-to-hip ratio seems to be linked to a significantly greater likelihood of conceiving. From here, researchers Christopher Burris and Armand Munteanu reasoned that men who are less willing to become a father would also find larger breasts less appealing. [myad]
Borno Elders’ Forum (BEF) has finally identified those who have been behind the sponsorship of Boko Haram.
The elders declared: “The people who sponsored the activities of Boko Haram or those who deliberately turned away from their official responsibilities on security issues, or those who looted the funds meant for the prosecution of the war against Boko Haram, and those who spoke or continue to speak in their favour are all one and the same.”
In a statement today by their leader, Ambassador Usman Gaji Galtimari swore that the bulk of them are those who benefited from the “sharing” of money meant for arms purchase.
Galtimari said that since the outbreak of the Boko Haram uprising from 2009 to date, BEF had been voicing out at every critical stage of the crisis, proffering possible ways of addressing very critical security and social issues.
The statement titled: “Boko Haram carnage and corruption, support for the federal government,” reads:
“Until the advent of the current government under President Muhammadu Buhari, we were ignored. We are somehow relieved that not only the present Government but the generality of our Nigerian compatriots are now showing great understanding and compassion on our sorry state of existence.
“We thank God for that. We are and will remain eternally grateful to President Buhari and the gallant, patriotic armed forces of Nigeria for the turn of events in our land.
“However, we feel disturbed and even betrayed by some Nigerians who seem to justify the carnage perpetrated upon our people. The massive killing of our people, the wholesome destruction of our settlements, the massive humanitarian crisis faced by over million internally displaced persons, the creation of hundreds of thousands of widows and orphans and so on, seem to be of no consequence to some Nigerians.
“The people who sponsored the activities of Boko Haram or those who deliberately turned away from their official responsibilities on security issues, or those who looted the funds meant for the prosecution of the war against Boko Haram, and those who spoke or continue to speak in their favour are all one and the same.
“They all individually and collectively aided and sponsored the Boko Haram insurgency. They colluded to ensure the death of our brave soldiers, our innocent people and the near total destruction of our society. Nigerians should stand by us and collectively assist to bring those responsible to book.
“It does not speak well of any Nigerian, for whatever reason, to fight or criticize the President of Nigeria or calling our anti–corruption agencies names when they simply want to make offenders pay for the crimes most of them have confessed to have committed.
“Much has been said about the sponsors of Boko Haram. With the horrifying revelations about the ‘Arms Deal’, it is no longer necessary to continue delaying the search for the real sponsors of Boko Haram.
“Those who collected such huge sums of money from the national treasury and converted same for their unending greed and avarice, should be regarded as part and parcel of the sponsors of Boko Haram. Get them and you will get the rest.
“We feel hurt and betrayed that some Nigerians are politicizing this despicable issue of ‘Arms Deal.’ People are rushing to our courts of law to manipulate the law, taking cover under the canopy of the constitution and misinterpreted human rights dicta to confuse the nation. Even the constitution itself has balanced interests of people against the interest of individuals.
“In this case, the interest of the victims should prevail when it comes to justice. Let those Nigerians know that thousands of Nigerians perished due to the misuse of funds meant for security not only the ‘Arms Deal’ case but several other instances before it. Playing politics with those issues is to condone the loss of lives and the destruction of our livelihood.
“Nigerians should allow the Federal Government and its relevant agencies to bring to book all those found to be involved in any act of omission or commission. Condoning blood money is to be equally bloody.
“While we urge government to urgently take statistics of all those who perished to enable the nation cater for the aftermath, we plead with fellow Nigerians to please allow the government go after the criminals and not confuse the polity. We are aggrieved and any further aggravation of our agony would be most inhuman.
“We equally plead with Mr. President, the National Assembly, the Judiciary and all anti-corruption/crime bursting agencies to dispense justice accordingly. We cry for justice.” [myad]
Ebonyi State Governor, Engr. David Umahi; Kano State Governor, Alhaji Umar Ganduje and Bauchi State Governor, Barr. Mohammed Abubakar, at the signing of an agreement between the Federal Government and the Bill Gates and Melinda Foundation on the production of vaccine for prevention of future outbreak of polio in Nigeria at the Presidential Villa in Abuja on Wednesday. [myad]
The Kusenla 111, The Elegushi of Ikateland in Lagos state, Oba Saheed Ademola Elegushi has vouch-safe for the ability of Governor Akinwunmi Ambode’s administration to provide the much desired infrastructural, economic and social development of the state in no distant future. In a statement by his Executive Secretary, Mr. Bamidele Ijagbemi, the monarch said that he is sure that the Lagos state has entered another era of superlative performance in infrastructural development and social welfare”. “As the traditional ruler of Ikate Elegushi Land, the welfare of the people and development of Lagos State are most paramount to me. My role as a ruler is to influence, initiate and drive development, and I am happy to find Governor Akinwunmi a willing partner. The Governor is a change agent whose tenure will increase the pace of development in Lagos State.” Oba Elegushi described the Governor as a man that can be trusted and relied upon. “For people who might not know, the current Governor has a track record of performance and history of accomplishments. He had served in different capacities in the administration of the state prior to his election as Lagos State Governor. I can assure everyone that his extensive knowledge and experience position him to effectively steer Lagos State to greater heights.” The monarch said that since the country returned to democracy in 1999, Lagos State has benefitted from quality leadership, and this is evident in the quantum of progress recorded by the state over that period. “From the days of Asiwaju Ahmed Bola Tinubu, who had the herculean task of cleansing the state of the debris of military dictatorship and creating a master plan for the state, to Mr. Babatunde Raji Fashola who brought to life the beauty of the master plan. Lagos State has demonstrated that foresight and purposeful governance is critical to growth and development, and this tradition will continue with Governor Ambode to make Lagos greater.” Oba Ademola Saheed Elegushi described Babatunde Raji Fashola, the Minister of Power, Works and House as a shinning example of responsible leadership that streamed out of the Asiwaju Ahmed Bola Tinubu School of Thought, even as he enjoined Lagosians to be patient with the incumbent Governor who has just settled down to deliver dividends of democracy to every resident of Lagos State. He emphasized that Governor Akinwunmi Ambode is a “rich blend of maturity, ingenuity, selflessness and sagacity which will make his tenure smooth and phenomenally successful.” The monarch also sounded a note of warning to persons of questionable character lurking in the state that “their time is up” and urged them to “turn a new leaf and be reintegrated into the society, or face the fury of the law because it is clear that there is no place for criminals in Lagos State with the recent empowerment of Nigeria Police Force and other security agencies in the state with helicopters, flying boats, motorbikes and cars. [myad]
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The Ahmadiyya Muslim Jama’at has cursed treasury looters and warned that if they do not return the money they stole from the nation’s treasury, God will punish them.
Inside Dambazau’s Shoes, By Reuben Abati
“Who?”
“Your fellow columnists. See how they are attacking the Minister of Interior, General Abdulrahman Dambazau, just because an orderly helped to shine his shoes in public.”
“I really don’t see what the hoopla is all about”
“Me too”
“I think many of our people just like to talk about shoes. For five years, Nigerians kept talking about how former President Goodluck Jonathan had no shoes as a child.”
“But he was the one that started it. Last week or so, the former President was again talking about shoes. In America.”
“I think people love shoes. That is why they won’t also allow Dambazau to rest over his shoes.”
“Read what your friend has written here. He says the orderly was subjecting himself to indignity by bending down to shine his oga’s shoes at a public ceremony.”
“He doesn’t understand. Many of the commentators are probably thinking of their own type of shoes. When you see some shoes, you’d certainly not want a speck of dust anywhere close by. There are shoes and there are shoes. All these people making noise, have they seen some shoes?”
“Someone once showed me his pair of shoes which he said he bought for 2, 000 pounds. I swear I’d gladly clean such shoes even if it is at a solemn funeral.”
“Do you have any idea the type of shoes the Minister was wearing?”
“No. But what does it matter? My point really is that people should stop blaming the Minister. Look when you are in public office, things like that happen. It is the duty of your aides to make sure you look good all the time. “
“I agree. A Minister of the Federal Republic must always be impeccably dressed. If you ask me to choose between Minister Dambazau and that one that wears beret and dresses as if he is going for a Man O’ War session, I’ll choose Dambazau any day.”
“My own point is that nobody should blame the Interior Minister. It is not as if he summoned the orderly and asked him to start shining his shoes in public. These things happen. We should blame the aide. Aides in government corridors are too sycophantic, sometimes, they don’t fit the occasion to the act.”
“I have seen quite a few of such aides. I once went with someone to visit a state Governor. The Governor was the only one sitting on a sofa. All his aides including commissioners sat on the floor. I didn’t know what to do, whether to stand or join the aides on the floor. “
“Those aides often respond to their oga’s body language though. And what did you do?”
“Me? I sat down on the sofa oh. I think it is the aides who are guilty. It is a peculiar kind of ailment: it is called eye service.”
“I know. We don’t really have a civil service.”
“We have an eye service. Anything that will make the boss happy, even if the same aides will later turn around and bad mouth the same boss.”
“You know in some government houses, aides behave like robots. When their boss stands up, they also stand. When the boss sits down, they too sit down. They eat what eats, and when they see the big man’s wife, they start grinning from ear to ear.”
“I have seen otherwise educated aides carrying bags for their Oga’s wife.”
“And you know they don’t need to be forced to do all that. People just do it. It is a way of showing loyalty”
“But I think your friend’s point in this article is that the big men should discourage such behaviour.”
“Have you not seen where people kneel down to talk to their boss? Even when they are asked to stand up or sit down, you’d see adults saying, let me remain on the ground sir. I am fine sir, Your Excellency. I am afraid one of these days, you’d see an aide prostrating publicly to make their boss feel good. Don’t blame the boss, blame the aide.”
“I still believe that some big men actually enjoy it. An old friend lost his job as a commissioner because he had developed the habit of arguing with the Governor at Council meetings. He refused to behave like other commissioners, the oga-is-always-right crowd.”
“Any boss that is always right cannot get it right.”
“You know, the guy told me that at a particular Council meeting, one of his colleagues stood up and told the Governor, sir in fact, I have been meaning to tell you, I don’t know how you do it, you are the wisest man I have ever seen, the best strategist in the world, the best thing to have ever happened to our state. Then, he asked other council members to give the Governor three gbosas. Our friend said he was shocked.”
“So, did he expect the Governor to sack the praise-singer?”
“That particular commissioner always got anything he wanted. Someone like that would willingly clean the Governor’s shoes, he’d in fact gladly do it. ”
“I imagine that it is the same in the corporate world. Some company executives behave like houseboys.”
“It is a Nigerian thing, then. I am sure if General Dambazau had asked that guy not to shine his shoes in public, he would have been very upset. He would think he has fallen out of favour. He was happy serving the boss, the same way policemen are happy to carry bags for other people’s wives.’
“It’s human nature. It’s this whole thing about the survival of the fittest.”
“Like surviving Lassa fever?”
“My brother! That’s frightening. I understand up to about 63 people have died already in 17 states, and that more may die.”
“The Minister of Health, Professor Isaac Adewole says the Nigerian Government will write the obituary of Lassa fever by April.”
“I hope so. If it is possible to do it before April, that will help, because the way Lassa fever is writing the obituary of so many people, it may turn out to be worse than Ebola virus.”
“I think the Minister and his team, and the various state governments are doing a good job of alerting the public to the dangers of Lassa fever. Even government agencies like the NYSC have deployed public enlightenment teams to market places.”
“One man ran away from a hospital while being treated for Lassa fever. May be government should begin to quarantine people. These days, when I see anybody looking sick, even if it is ordinary fever, I start by imagining the worst and I keep my distance.”
“I hear some people eat house rats.”
“What?”
“Then, public enlightenment should become even more vigorous. Eat rat? How can anybody eat Okon Calabar?”
“Who is that?”
“Okon Calabar. That’s what we called rats when I was in school. You know some of these big rats that don’t run away from human beings. When they see you, they actually act like they want to jump on you. I believe those are the real multi mammate rats.”
“I have asked somebody to help me buy two cats.”
“You have rats in your house? What kind of house is that? Where do you live?”
“I live in Babana Island.”
“Babana Island. Not Banana Island? Oh, Babana. That island that is around Abule Egba, close to one refuse dump”
“You no well.”
“When your house is dirty, and nothing is well kept, you’d breed rats, of course.”
“I don’t live in dirty surroundings. I am just taking precautions. And take my advice, also try and buy cats. Let’s kill all the rats in Nigeria.”
“I like that. Let’s kill the rats and save lives. But you don’t need cats, get a fumigator to drive all dangerous things away from your house: rats, cockroaches, mosquitoes.”
“The cost of fumigation has gone up. I hear fumigators are making serious gains now.”
“Very soon, the cost of cats will also rise. “
“Cats?”
“Yes. Don’t you know that everything is business in this country?”
“There are too many human rats out there ready to take advantage.”
“What do you mean human rats?”
“You don’t know some human beings are like rats, causing fever?
“You are speaking in tongues. Okay, name one human rat that you know.”
“I am looking at one right now.”
“Me?”
“Yes”
“No. I am not. You should be talking to those militants in the Niger Delta who are again sabotaging the country by blowing up oil installations, and giving the Federal Government conditions.”
“The Port Harcourt, Warri, and Kaduna refineries have been shut down due to pipeline vandalism. At this rate, we ‘d soon buy fuel at N200 per litre.”
“God knows we can’t afford another round of Niger Delta militancy. We have Boko Haram. We have the Biafra “secessionists.” And now Niger Delta militants are back to the creeks and trying to reverse the gains of the amnesty programme. In the end, we will all suffer for it.”
“Don’ t worry, those boys will be dealt with.”
“At what cost? It is better to nip the crisis in the bud.”
“How? By begging the militants? The Federal Government has made it clear that it will not succumb to blackmail.”
“Who is talking about blackmail?”
“Wahala today. Wahala tomorrow. This Nigeria sef.”
“Yes oh. They are even saying we will now pay stamp duty on all monies paid into our bank accounts once the amount is over N1, 000. When you add that to other bank charges, how much is left?”
“My friend, it is just N50.”
“It is not just N50. Why must I dash government money? Is government now begging for alms? Is it that bad? If I want to give anybody alms, it should be my decision.”
“There is a law called Stamp Duties Act. They want to enforce the law.”
“So, a bank is now a branch of the Post Office? If anybody posts money into my account, government will force me to buy stamp? And yet we want a cashless society? Very soon, people will stop doing electronic transfers.”
“Don’t be stingy. Be a good citizen.”
“N50 on every transaction. For people who run active accounts, that could amount to very heavy tax by the end of a month. You know what? I think they should just re-name the banks and call them post offices, since they are now selling stamps.”
“As in?”
“As in Zenith Post Office”
“Diamond Post Office”
“Union Post Office”.
“Na wa oh.” [myad]